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Trillium Flowers & Gardens
113 Petaluma Blvd North
Petaluma
CA 94952
Telephone: 707.778.6315
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Many weeks if not months can go into planning a wedding with so
many details to consider and decisions to be made. By the time the
big day arrives, much time and cost has been invested. It can make
a bride anxious and very distracted on her wedding day. By now she
wants more than anything for everything to be perfect and perfect
does not exist. As a professional makeup artist I have had
the opportunity, over the years to work with many brides on their
wedding day. It has given me a glimpse into an intimate world. I
have seen much of what works and what can be avoided. After my own
wedding day experience this world took on a new perspective, working
with brides became more intuitive and our exchange more meaningful.
Shortly after we returned from our honeymoon I
was working with a new client, a bride on her wedding day. We met
at her parent¹s home. All was going smoothly, the family was
supportive and remained calm through the bustle of activity. Then
just before the bride was to get dressed and the last minute details
put in place, I noticed her...for lack of a better description,
"shut down" or "glaze-over". It surprised me
because for the first time, I realized that I had done the same
thing! I clearly recalled that this faraway, glazed state had stayed
with me the entire day. I could not shake my internal distractions
and be fully present. I was overwhelmed. I asked the bride that
day if we could work alone for a few minutes. Her family kindly
obliged. I closed the door and asked her how she was feeling; "Nervous!"
she answered. I told her a quick story about my wedding day experience.
Then I asked her if she would sit alone for a few minutes, close
her eyes and remember the true reasons for this day, focusing on
the love she felt for her husband to-be, their promise to each other,
the people gathering who loved them most, letting go of the details,
and allowing for mishaps! Enjoying this celebration no matter what.
A few minutes later I returned to the room, her
far-away distraction was replaced with a more rested expression;
she was back. A few weeks later I received a very lovely
thank you note from her, one that stood out as different from the
others. This one was not as much about how she appreciated her hair
and make-up but how grateful she was for her silent meditation,
and how it helped her to enjoy her day more fully.
It was meaningful to me to know I had helped her in this way. Many
years have passed since then and this added benefit for the bride
has evolved with each new bride I¹ve worked with. I like to
incorporate a candle and a flower to create a calm environment.
I find this time in makeup can be therapeutic. Working with many
singers and actors over the years, I have observed this time as
an opportune moment for preparation and review, whether it¹s
warming the vocal chords or studying lines. This time for reflection,
setting intentions, clearing and letting go, is not so different
for brides.
I like to have a note pad ready because it never fails, that when
the bride is finally physically still, the last few details rise
to the surface. At this point I ask her to write down even the seemingly
trivial concerns and then delegate the duties to her wedding coordinator
or trustworthy friend.
The physical act of writing down the last few details
is a simple act of "getting it out of your head" a powerful
tool and an important first step towards inner peace. This is the
time to deliberately hand over the controls to that trusted individual.
The task of planning your wedding is now complete. Creating a space
for grace begins here. The time has come to separate yourself from
the role of the planner to that of a blissful bride, a woman with
a clear head and a light heart, fully present on her wedding day.
Take this time to relax, close your eyes and consider your intentions,
you are no longer concerned with the details regarding this event
because that job belongs to someone else.
--Colette Taber, make up artist,
www.IlluminatedBride.com
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